Comments on: Decorating With Portraits

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By: Life with Kaishon

Life with Kaishon — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 15:19:56 +0000

I love your picture frames. LOVE love LOVE! And I love how much you love your kid. I honestly think that every day moments are one thousand times better than fancy studio pictures any way. Real is beautiful.

By: Photo Wall Art Display {Home Decor Inspiration} | I Heart Faces

Photo Wall Art Display {Home Decor Inspiration} | I Heart Faces — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 14:16:22 +0000

[...] We love this simple idea for your home. It would be perfect for a kid’s room. You could even interchange some of the photos with your child’s current artwork. Photo featured on Crap I’ve Made. [...]

By: Lei

Lei — Mon, 17 Oct 2011 03:20:15 +0000

Char… I am sorry for your heartache and the amount of effort seemingly small things require of you. We did get a few good shots that day but I know it didn’t go as smoothly as you’d hoped. (You forgot to mention how blasted cold it was that day… crazy Utah weather.) But I agree, do not give up and just capture him in his element for now. And next time I am in Utah we’re going to give it another go! My treat.

By: Angie Pangie

Angie Pangie — Sat, 15 Oct 2011 00:23:17 +0000

Ugh. Good to *see* some of the other Moms out there.

By: Angie Pangie

Angie Pangie — Sat, 15 Oct 2011 00:21:44 +0000

Char,

I’m a long time reader, but not so great about commenting. (So sorry, I’m always reading though!) I’m a little late to the game here, but I wanted to chime in, too. My daughter “Lilly” is 13.5 and also has Asperger’s (along with lots of other fun stuff that makes everyone want to pull their hair out – except me?)
Your post reminded me of when I took Lil to her first professional photo session – when she was 12 months old and (I didn’t know she was autistic) she just BAWLED. We snapped pics with me dabbing tears in between the shots. She was so stinking stressed out. When people see those photos now they always say something about the “amazing expressive” look on her face – fact is she was in between sobs and when *I* look at those pictures I only see the pain she was experiencing.

There are so many things Lilly *can* do, like you with your son, I refuse to focus on the things she cannot do. She’s not photogenic, that’s true, but she’s endearing and beautiful off camera. On a daily basis I say to my (wonderfully supportive) girlfriends how I long for another Mom who I can ask “What do you do to keep your kid from squirting toothpaste on the mirror every morning?” It’s good to some of the other Moms out there.
xo, Angie Pangie

By: Carla

Carla — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 17:06:11 +0000

Thanks for sharing such a personal part of your life. I like the others who have commented would have never known. I love the side portrait of him. You’re candid shots are wonderful and the clipboard wall is an awesome idea. And from the comments above you’re not alone. God Bless you and the others who have found the strength, perserverance, love and patience for I know at times must be a high demanding life.

By: Amy

Amy — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 01:55:16 +0000

I normally don’t comment on sites I view, but my heart goes out to you. My son who is 12 has aspergers or high functioning autism, (depends on who is defining it). We didn’t realize what it was until he was in about the 4th grade. Pictures can definitely be a sensitive matter whether it’s what he has to wear or being to close to someone who might touch him. Then it’s the forced awkward smile that always comes out. Anyhow, I am going to attempt to do family pictures tomorrow and have been trying to prep him so that it is not a traumatic experience. Thanks for your wonderful post. If you would like to talk more about these kind of struggles, you can contact me anytime.

By: Sharon

Sharon — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 00:26:40 +0000

I also have a son with aspergers. I have learned to accept the fact that we will never have the cute family photos. However, I have lots of snapshots displaying my son’s funny sense of humor such as being attacked by a stuffed shark. It was great to see your vulnerability. We need more of that because that’s what people really want. Thanks.

By: Colleen @ A Misplaced Trust

Colleen @ A Misplaced Trust — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 20:51:21 +0000

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the idea of using clipboards as frames!!!!! Super cute!!!! I also wanted to tell you that while professional photos are nice, I think you learn the true personality of a person in candid photos. I think all of your children are adorable and they all look very healthy and happy to me! Keep up the good work, mom!

By: Char @ Crap I've Made

Char @ Crap I've Made — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 15:41:54 +0000

I agree that our professional photographs are beautiful and that my friend Leilani did an amazing job. It’s just that I see the Asperger’s. And I see the anxiety on his face. And I know how hard the picture experience was for him. I don’t want him to be reminded of that. I want him to be reminded of how awesome he is at karate. And of times he felt happy.

By: Emily

Emily — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 15:32:38 +0000

I agree with Stephanie and Cokette.

I love the pictures you’ve taken. I think they’re much more fun and interesting than the “posed” ones. I wonder if some time your son would have fun taking pictures with an inexpensive camera while you (or someone else) takes pictures with another camera? Or planning an informal photo shoot around an activity that your son absolutely loves? (just thoughts for the future)

By: Kim Fahrni

Kim Fahrni — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 14:51:25 +0000

I was a Special Behavior Aide for 9 yrs. The last 3, I was exclusively with a 7 yr old moderatly autistic girl. One of her “challenges” was picture day, which our school had twice a year. The last time I took her, dreading the explosion, she sat when asked, posed, and smiled at the camera!!! It was BEAUTIFUL!!! I still have the picture. My point is keep trying! You never know when you will be able to finally get that precious picture and it will be sooooooo worth it!

By: meagan

meagan — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 13:17:20 +0000

All your photos look wonderful! I love the way you’ve displayed them. You are doing a wonderful job capturing the true moments of your children’s lives. It can be nice to have professional photos taken, but when you look back at all the pictures over the years, it’s the every-day shots that bring back the most memories & tell the best stories.

Stay strong & keep up the great work!!

By: Cokette

Cokette — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 13:15:45 +0000

I agree with Stephanie, if you hadn’t told what was “wrong” with the picture(in your opinion), I would’ve never noticed anything. He’s an adorable little boy! The one of him looking sideways is just precious and a true smile was captured on his face.

By: April L

April L — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 10:45:20 +0000

I love what you did & I have been trying to think of a different & cheap way to do this & now I have it!!! Thanks so much!!

I have a 16 yr old son w/Autism. We are still trying to figure out on the spectrum where he falls but she feels it is worse than Aspergers! Ugh! You are not alone & I have been dealing with his Autism/Bipolar since he was 2. I have been a single mom since he was 4 & have 3 others than him. (He is the youngest.) It is a never ending, unpredictable, sometimes happy & sometimes sad waves we go through but in the end & no matter what, I would love him anyway he was sent to me!

By: Joni Walton

Joni Walton — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 09:29:54 +0000

I love how this post is so helpful in terms of cute ideas and so honest and sweet in terms of your “struggles”. You are such a wonderful Mom. I mean it. And, I miss you. And, Joseph was just saking about Bryan the other day. We need dinner at Sampan.

By: delia

delia — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 05:51:05 +0000

Char. I just want to hug you. Thanks for being open and honest and inspiring. I don’t have a child who has aspergers but I have just plain crazy kids. And they bounce around like bouncy balls when we do things like family portraits. That’s why I made our family picture last year a jumping one. Yes, the family picture every one got in their Christmas card is of us jumping. Ha ha…I love it. While the boys are young, I figure we’re just going to have to go with what they can handle for now.

I so want a wall of just the memories like you created. I think your post has been the most inspiring out of all the guest posts of this series for me. Those are the pictures that evoke the genuine emotion that I want to remember…not the posed forced smiles {although those can be a funny memory in and of itself}.