Finally doing something

I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while, but I never know quite what to say. I’m not good with words.

When a crisis happens, I’m a do-er. I want to have something I’m responsible for, something to do to help.

In March of 2007, one of my very best friends had a baby girl that lived only a few minutes. I felt helpless and worthless. I didn’t know what to do.

Later that year, when I was pregnant with Bennett, one of my cousins delivered a stillborn baby girl. Again, I felt like a jerk…especially because I was still pregnant. What could I do?

And, in early 2008, while I was still pregnant with Bennett, another one of my cousins delivered a stillborn baby girl. More helplessness. I wanted to do SOMETHING…anything.

3 losses — all within one year, all people that I adore.

I wish I could say that I went right out and did something fabulous, but I didn’t. I had a baby and tried to figure out how to balance life with 4 kids. And I forgot.

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I don’t remember when I “met” Heidi, but I do vividly remember sitting in front of my computer screen sobbing at the slide show of her angel Elizabeth. Heidi’s the woman behind Angel Babies. She did something. She hosts sewing days at her house (and feeds people some seriously delicious food). I went to one a while back and made some gowns (click on the “Patterns” tab over at Angel Babies). It affected me in a way I cannot explain.

And here’s the part where I really don’t know what to say.

Can you sew even a little? Are you looking for a service project for a church/community group?

Consider making some gowns.

Do you have a bunch of fabric, ribbon, or trims laying around?

Consider donating it.

Heidi’s contact info is on the Angel Babies site.

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Adding info from Heidi’s comment:

Thank you so much for this post. I’ve already gotten emails from a couple of people. The timing is perfect. I was just starting to feel a little overwhelmed by the needs lately. I’ve been shipping them all over the country in the last few weeks, and of course, there are so many needs here locally.

FYI for those of you that are interested in doing them, I get requests frequently for information from people in lots of different places. I love it when people can make a connection with their local hospital or Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep photographer so that they can do things to benefit people in their own community. Of course, I am always delighted to have donations for babies in Utah, but I feel like it’s a really really great thing for people to serve in their own territory. If you need help finding where to donate your things, send me a note – hvawdrey (at) gmail (dot) com.

Comments

  1. There was a woman I used to attend church with involved in a similar organization. I made a few gowns then, but need to do it again. You're right, it was an amazing experience sewing for that sort of a cause.

  2. you were there, and that was enough. (you too, Sabe)

  3. I lost my son after 15 1/2 hours 3 years ago and so I am touched… and thankful for your heart. I love this idea. Going there now.

  4. Me and Madeline says:

    Thanks for sharing this. I just spent the last 30 minutes reading and clicking around the site and I'm moved to tears. A good friend of mine delivered a stillborn baby girl last summer and like you, I didn't know what to say. I wish I'd read the page for "family and friends" back then!

  5. Thank you for posting this. I too felt like I needed to help serve in this cause recently and made some simple, smaller blankets (since the regular ones are usually too large and can overwhelm their little bodies) for my local hospital. Which, if you aren't an experienced enough sewer to sew a gown you can do a simple small blanket for parents to wrap their child in as well.

  6. Thank you for sharing this. I can totally relate. It's never easy, whether it happens to you or someone you love.
    I had a friend who lost her son to SIDS. We started Rylee's Cause- it offers support to families affected by SIDS, and also raises awareness. We didn't know what to say, so we did something! I myself had an ectopic pregnancy this year, and just knowing that people were praying for me was a comfort I cannot describe.

  7. You're so sweet for spreading the words on wonderful organizations like this.
    Last year I lost a baby girl unexpectedly and it was heartbreaking. I was absolutely overwhelmed by the organizations that supplied us with teeny blankets and other items that mean so much to me. Five weeks later to the day one of my closest friends lost her little boy. I started making teeny hats and blankets for the groups that helped us.

    There are so many families out there losing children and such a simple act as donating fabric or time makes a world of difference. Thanks for spreading the word.

  8. Suzanne says:

    I'm involved in a similar program here in Utah. We lost one of our twins at birth 26+ years ago and there wasn't much support. Glad these type of programs can support families going thru a hard time.

  9. Rich, Britt, and Nate says:

    I have been reading all the stories and have been crying the whole time. After having a miscarrage late last year I can some what relate. What a wonderful way to show service with the gowns.

  10. Sunshine of Seven says:

    I am grateful there are compassionate people out there, just being there for us when we need them. My heart goes out to anyone that has lost a precious soul.

  11. MomOfAllTrades says:

    Thank you for sharing this. I lost a baby almost nine years ago now, my first little girl after two sons. When my best friend lost a little girl half way through her pregnancy, I avoided her and the whole situation because I didn't know how to handle it. I found out through experience that it was the worst thing I could have done. I have done things in my own way for the memory of my daughter, but this is great. Thanks :)

  12. Nurse Heidi says:

    Oh Char…you rock! Thank you so much for this post. I've already gotten emails from a couple of people. The timing is perfect. I was just starting to feel a little overwhelmed by the needs lately. I've been shipping them all over the country in the last few weeks, and of course, there are so many needs here locally.

    FYI for those of you that are interested in doing them, I get requests frequently for information from people in lots of different places. I love it when people can make a connection with their local hospital or Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep photographer so that they can do things to benefit people in their own community. Of course, I am always delighted to have donations for babies in Utah, but I feel like it's a really really great thing for people to serve in their own territory. If you need help finding where to donate your things, send me a note – hvawdrey (at) gmail (dot) com.

  13. Nishant says:

    thankful for your heart. I love this idea. Going there now.
    home jobs india

  14. I hope to see you tomorrow at Heidi's I contacted her after reading this post and she told me about tomorrow and said you were coming. I sat and sobbed while reading her site. I lot 3 babies in the last year with no hope for more and I am excited to do something for others.

  15. Thanks for re-posting this on facebook today. This is a fantastic idea and I can't wait to help out.

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